Okay, my xanga is different once again. And for all of you who were all freaked out cause it was black, it's not anymore, so stop complaining. And I even put some Georgia O'Keefe flowers at the bottom. Aren't they pretty? Calla lilies. So gorgeous. And the profile pic is my brother and I shortly after I was born. Aren't we the cutest?? Yes, of course we are.
Anyway, I'm at home now... I hung out with Sean today. I sometimes forget how much I miss that man. And he is a man now. Wow. It's amazing. I love him, as a friend of course. He's like a brother to me. I seem to have a lot of guy friends like that... oh well. Anyway, we went to the mall and chatted over some Chinese food. Well, he had Chinese food. I just watched him eat... It's quite interesting, actually... Well, then my family and I went to Panera and ate. That place is soooo good. And then we went to go see my aunt Linda. She rocks x90.
Tomorrow, I'm visiting Covenant and then I don't know what. I might go see my girls: Maya and Kylee. I miss them so much when I'm away and they always make me feel so loved. They are the sweetest kids ever. And the cutest.
While I am having semi-fun at home, I am anxious to go back to school. I think it's because I don't feel like I belong here anymore. I belong at school. That's where I'm supposed to be and that's where I want to be. I mean, even when I come home to my own house, it doesn't feel like home to me anymore. I feel like a visitor in my own home. I have to sleep on a futon in my dad's office and Stephen sleeps on a futon in my mom's craft room. I have to get permission to do most things. I mean, I don't feel adult when I'm at home. I feel like a kid staying at an aunt's house or something. It's weird...
Okay, so yea, obviously, I have lots of mixed feelings about home. I keep expressing them. I'll stop now... Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else
I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times but somehow
I want more
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
Tap on my window, knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get so insecure
It doesn't matter anymore
It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along
My heart is full and my door's always open
You can come anytime you want
I know where you hide
Alone in your car
Know all of the things that make you who you are
I know that goodbye means nothing at all
Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye | 
